Looking Past the Hocus Pocus
As the early evenings creep in, and the darker side of the year is joined by chilly weather, we begin to recognize all the “darker sides.” This is the time of year (in the northern hemisphere) to face and embrace our Shadow — the side of ourselves and our psyche that remains hidden, unknown.
Much of the Halloween festivities can be interpreted as a revealing of the Shadow self. The hocus pocus of costumes and treats can create a fun bit of theater to bring to light aspects of our Shadow selves. In other words, Halloween makes us think about things we don’t like to think about on a regular basis — fear, fright, horror, gore, and, of course, death.
We spend much of the year trying not to think about death unless we’re forced to by tragedy or disaster (a.k.a. a regular news day). So, why would we want to embrace this time of year? Well, there is a difference between:
a) being forced to think about the horrors of death during a stressful event, and
b) pondering death through ritual, story, and costume.
The first is a sudden and stressful way the unconscious is brought to our attention, and the latter is a more proactive way to practice facing our fears. If we only ever think about the dark side of this life during sudden tragedy, we will end up with maladaptive ways of coping with such events.
The majority of Halloween rituals apply fairly well to this idea of facing the Shadow, aside from the overly commercialized aspects (expensive costumes, going overboard with candy, etc.) Halloween, and really any holiday, is not about status (though they are about treats!) But, if you’re interested in going a bit beyond the surface of Halloween, there are some more meaningful ideas for this time of year from pagan traditions surrounding Samhain (November 1st), which also begins the new year for those traditions. (However, I have never been a fan of cold-weather new year holidays; I would be more inclined to celebrate this time as the new year in the southern hemisphere).
Samhain is all about honoring the dead (celebrated by Catholics as All Saints Day); however, Samhain is meant to be more personal. It is about honoring the dead in our own families and communities. It is about visiting cemeteries and remembering ancestors. Samhain is a memorial holiday without shying away from the dark side of memorial.
Any Google search will give you ideas for Samhain if you’re interested, so I’ll just list some of the ideas here that I find most meaningful.
Tell stories of ancestors. Speak their names. Nothing brings someone to life like a story about them. Make it a tradition to tell stories about those who have passed. They don’t have to be perfect stories; they just have to be authentic. I always think of this quote from David Eagleman:
“There are three deaths. The first is when the body ceases to function. The second is when the body is consigned to the grave. The third is that moment, sometime in the future, when your name is spoken for the last time.”
The more we speak the names of our ancestors, the longer they are kept from “the third death.” Perfect for Halloween, Samhain, and All Saints Day!
Ask for a dream. If there is an ancestor you wish to have a dialogue with, dreams can be a fulfilling way to have those conversations for personal reflection. Whether you believe that the supernatural veil between worlds is thin at this time of year or you believe the psychic “veil” between the conscious and unconscious is thin when sleeping, asking for a dream will set the intention to receive the message you’re seeking.
Sometimes a requested dream arrives quickly, other times it takes months or years. For obvious reasons, it’s a tricky system. I’m lucky to have grown up in a family that finds dreams to be meaningful and useful curiosities. We have always talked about dreams, including talking to ancestors in dreams, and I’ve had a number of meaningful chats.
Do some genealogy. Take it one step further and do some digging into family letters, old keepsakes, photographs, or get online and start putting together a family tree. These are great ways to honor the dead in the present and also leave a path for future generations to follow. You may even find out some interesting surprises, especially if you test your DNA!
Write down the magic your ancestors gave you. By magic, I don’t mean “hocus pocus,” but the meaningful words and lessons they instilled in you to carry on into the future long after they’re gone. It’s an exercise that honors your family culture with a good dose of gratefulness. If you’re having trouble identifying anything positive (not all legacies are created equal), think about the ways they showed you what not to do. There’s strong magic in that, too!
Have a fun (and safe) Halloween and meaningful Samhain!
